I give the boobies two thumbs up. Andrew on the other hand, showed up late, wore an Apple Watch, and appears to have on some sort of hooded sweater which is both impractical and silly looking.

Faye spilled beer, serious deduction for ambiance.

This burger is as good as Andrew is bad. It's sweetness and harmoniousness are qualities that Andrew doesn't not exhibit. It strikes a great balance between flavors. Andrew doesn't. Also, eating underneath giant pornographic images enhances the experience significantly. Andrew did not.

Andrew wasn't great, but everything else was.

Andrew rating: 1.673

Great burger. Pretty dense and heavy but a ton of great flavor. Value isn't amazing ($25 for beer, burger and fries) but it was good. Fries were incredible! I thought the toppings and sauces worked really well with the burger. Really nice wait staff.

-1 for Andrew. He (by proxy) knocked a beer over. Gave me my first (fake) compliment and is wearing an Apple Watch with all the bells and whistles, yet he was still late.

This was a messy, complex, unexpected and absolutely delicious burger. The addition of the sausage added a sweetness and a boost of flavor that elevated what could've otherwise been a run of the mill beef slab. The sauces co-mingled nicely, sweet and spicy and creamy, and while it made the whole affair a slip sliding mess it was ok. Fries and sauce were excellent, value for our prix fixe was excellent, service from Tiffany was wonderful. A fine fine experience.

Meat was a bit overcooked and dry. Runny egg > cheese forever!

I don't think I've ever had a burger leave quite this kind of flavor to linger on my tongue. That sounds gross now that I type it, but it's true.

Normally I'm a strict ketchup and pickles only kinda guy with my burgers, but I embraced the maximilist approach to this burger and was rewarded. Good on it.

I was going to award Andrew a 10, but someone pointed out he was wearing an apple watch so...6.

This was a very creative burger reminiscent of a Vietnamese grilled pork with rice patty and dippy sauce. The spicy meat was complimented by the sweet pickles veggies. Although this was delicious- it is very particular and not necessarily for those who seek the tradition burger and fries. As for Andrew- I sat next to him and he smelled like failure. But he was nice to me in the end... so I give him a 4.5 😍

The mix of sausage, beef, mayonnaise, spicy "banana ketchup", and a nice bun makes this a helluva burger.

On a sour note - apparently overwhelmed by the routine demands of everyday life, Andrew arrived donning a new Apple Watch, which, instead of enhancing his productivity, only made him arrive late due to the distraction of constantly updated displays of his (slow) step count. I give him a 4/10.